Friday, April 29, 2005

Hawaii and germs and drums

Late night - long distance IM conversations can be quite amusing (at least to me).

Things you need to know:
1. Tony used to live in Phoenix, now he’s in Hawaii and works at an internet cafe
2. My new job has me finding citations for medical uses of natural things; spices etc.
3. At the time, I was looking for stuff that kills other stuff, i.e. anti-microbial.
4. Tony knows all this.
5. This conversation has been edited for content and to run in the time allotted

Tony: have you ever heard of a Rife frequency machine?
Pam: nope. Musical, medical or kinky?
Tony: heh, medical actually
Pam: ok, I googled it
Pam: it blows up bacteria?!?!?!?!?
Pam: that doesn’t sound safe. Cell walls should stay intact. It keeps you from melting into a pool of jelly
Tony: lol well according to the creator, it only disrupts cells that operate at certain frequencies
Pam : “Before experimenting with Rife Equipment you should change your diet and alkalize your body with specific minerals and vitamins”
Pam : and maybe its the pH change that kills the bacteria dumbass
Tony : NO! i want to burst cells!
Pam : I'll visit you in the hospital after you melt
Tony : "he wouldn’t stay in the bed, so we had to put him in that kiddie pool over there...:"
Pam: Why do you know about this?
Tony: one of the customers was printing stuff out about it
Pam : but WHY was someone researching it? granola-head?
Tony : i dunno
Tony : he usually prints out real estate stuff
Pam : ah, a renaissance man
Tony : not one of our typical "granola" customers
Pam : he's stealth granola
Tony : if stealth granola is poured into a bowl, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
Pam : lol
Pam : what if a tree falls on it?
Tony : it stealthily says "crunch"
Pam : crunch

Pam : Antimicrobial effect of essential oils on the seafood spoilage microorganism Photobacterium phosphoreum in liquid media and fish did this become my life?
Tony : uh... you asked for it?
Pam : tru
Pam : That article is from the Department of Seafood Research, Danish Institute for Fisheries Research
Pam : my next band will be called Department of Seafood Research

Pam : still playing drums? or not because of the living situation
Tony : well... no interest really
Pam : another good reason
Tony : but yeah, the living sit pretty much prohibits it anyway... and no one to jam with
Pam : you could put up flyers in all the local coffeehouses...Wanted: guitar and bass player to form band...must supply drum kit
Pam : and practice space
Tony : what ever happened to your drumming?
Pam : I sold my kit, every time I went to practice I got a headache
Pam : i don’t like loud noises enough to drum
Tony : but you are ok at a punk concert...?
Pam : yes, because it's different. I get in a zone or something. It’s Rock and Roll baby
Pam : and at a show you don’t have to think
Tony : lol too bad you never found the zone on the drum kit
Tony : and drumming is mindless... you just let it flow, baby (yeah right)
Pam : didn’t get to that flow stage...always counting, counting and twirling forward, always forward
Pam : actually I should go back to the drums so I can learn just enough to impress hot drummers and then they will be enraptured with my sparkling personality and forget that I knew anything about drums
Tony : got a thing for drummers?
Pam : yeah
Tony : what about ex-wannabe-drummers?
Pam : sure, why not
Pam : or wait...does that mean me?
Pam : eww

Pam : German is fun - Lebensmitteltechnik, the journal of the Institut fuer Lebensmittelforschung
Tony : Ghezunteight?
Pam : exactly

Pam : according to my research, you should eat a half tablespoon of cinnamon a day...but not in tea or sugar
Pam : just a big, heaping half tablespoon of cinnamon
Tony : yum
Pam : can you imagine how easy it would be to sneeze that all over a room
Tony : Lebensmitteltechnik
Tony : there went my cinnamon
Pam : LOL
Pam : Lucy just came in to see what I was laughing at
Tony : and this is supposed to be antimicrobial?
Pam : yes cinnamon is antimicrobial, but maybe not against h. pylori (the ulcer virus)
Tony : ulcers can be viral?
Pam : yes, they are no longer believed to be caused by stress
Tony : I’m guessing a teaspoon of cinnamon would irritate an ulcer
Pam : probably
Tony : break out the virus exploding machine
Pam : and what? swallow the probe?
Tony : heh there is that route
Pam : it's shorter than the other route
Tony : heh... no comment

Pam : some dude is really worried about Listeria monocytogenes in apple juice, he's written 3 different articles
Tony : and I’m not even going to pretend to know what a listeria monocytogene is or why someone put it in my apple juice

Pam : cinnamon also has anti HIV activity...can you imagine the condoms?
Tony : but pam, they already have cinnamon flavored condoms... probably artificial tho...
Pam : i imagine the cinnamon would have to be on the inside to be effective
Pam : i'm picturing burning...
Tony : New! Hot n Spicy Cinnamon Condoms! "Trojan Ma... ah! ahhhh! the burning!!!"
Pam : lol

Tony : oh... and Joe Arpaio's new pink handcuffs made the local paper
Pam : i think arpaio is closeted
Pam : he likes pink WAY too much
Tony : a true gay man, would never wear pink boxers
Pam : a straight man would, because he would have washed them with a red shirt
Tony : lol not me... i think im phobic about doing that
Pam : better phobic then pink socked

Pam : well, gotta go get ready for dinner and knitting
Pam : talk to you soon
Tony : have fun
Pam : and don’t forget to take your cinnamon
Tony : before, or after the machine?
Pam : possibly during - just for the explosion potential
Tony : Its like a cinnamon explosion!
Pam : exactly – that’s how those marketing guys got the idea

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